Lockdown stage 4 is still going in Melbourne.

Is this bothering me? Who knows, I don’t have time to think about it, I’m currently watching 2 seasons of The Block simultaneously and have 14 seasons to go!!!

A lot of people feel uneasy about what their future holds due to COVID 19, not me, I know my future holds a lot of Scotty Cam and Foreman Keith.

In the most recent series of The Block at each feedback session of the room reveals they show on screen who the judges are, they’re Neale Whittaker, a man called Darren and Shaynna Blaze, crazy when Darren is the least bogan name right? WTF is that spelling about? I bought an amazing pillow from Shaynna’s range, it was super cheap at a discount store, you know who wouldn’t get in trouble for going over budget on The Block? ME!!. Anyway they announce the judges and then for some absolutely bonkers reason there’s a 30 second montage of all the judges dancing, and just to be clear, they work in interior design, they are not dancers.

What I find soothing about The Block in lockdown is that they have short term goals to accomplish, it makes me feel like something is happening, I feel like a lot of TV is gaslighting me into thinking something has happened, but nothing is happening, the characters life stays exactly the same as they try to address their flaws but they’re actually too self obsessed to do that. BORING! SHOW ME A FEATURE WALL! WHAT IS THAT? A SUN FILLED VOID? STUNNING!

I’m currently banned from The Block facebook page, not by facebook, just by myself for my own mental health. I so desperately want to rebut peoples rude comments on there. Australia really has a problem with tall poppy syndrome, there happens to be one couple who have the best style on this season (2020) of The Block, Tam and Jimmy and they have won a lot of challenges because they make beautiful spaces. On the facebook page people write things like ‘They need to be taken down a peg or two’ as if it was Tam and Jimmys decision to get the best score from the judges, again on facebook people said ‘Their bathroom is horrible’ or ‘what man would want to have a shower in there?’ Listen here bitch, men are not notoriously picky for where they shower and I’m sorry you didn’t like the pink bathroom that had style, sure I agree with Shaynna, their lighting probably isn’t the greatest in term of functionality but you maam, bet you just like plain white and grey bathrooms that have no style because they’re devoid of personality just like you. I think about the responses I would write if I lost self control until 2 or 3am, my boyfriend hears me whisper in my sleep ‘Report her comment for hatespeech….’

I’ve been watching 3 hours of the Block a day, spread out of course, I watch one with my coffee in the morning, one with lunch and one in the middle of the night when I’m struggling to sleep. The reassurance of hearing Scotty Cam yell ‘Tools Down’ is all that gets me through. In the show they’ve been advertising a Scotty Cam bobble head doll that speaks, I think about the doll a lot, would it be the helpful security blanket I need? Or when things start to open will I be the woman sitting opposite a Scotty doll at a cafe? Only time will tell.